Cheryl’s Corners

1. Do not talk about the kids. A date with your husband is, first and foremost, adult time. Conversations about your son’s fender bender or your daughter’s creepy boyfriend or the need for better after school care should be tabled for another night. Barring calamitous circumstance, this night is not about you as mother and father, but as woman and man. Everything else can wait until tomorrow.

1. Leave the problems of the past in the past. Remember that time he forgot your birthday and then bought you a “Dustbuster” as a late birthday present? How about the time she embarrassed you at the Christmas Party by unintentionally insulting your boss? Great. I’m glad you both remember. Now, leave those memories with the baggage you left at home. Tonight is about forging a new beginning, don’t let it get tarnished with the troubles of the past.

1. Fall in love again for all the right reasons. If you’ve been married to your spouse for a while, he may be a different person now than the one you married. The one constant in life is change—no matter how slight.  People change over time and often so subtly that we don’t notice as it happens. Neither of you are kids anymore. Get to know each other as grown-ups.

1. Do not talk about money. This an absolute no-no. Nothing will sour a date faster than an argument about credit card bills. The health of the economy isn’t great right now. A lot of people are struggling to make ends meet.  But leave that at home. Try to enjoy your night out, at least just this once, without considering its cost.

1. Vary your date locations. You don’t always have to go to the same café or bar. Find new places and new activities you can enjoy together. Explore. Sometimes a simple change of scenery is all you really need.

1. Let your baggage go. He’s got problems. You’ve got problems. Maybe you’ve been working through some of them. Maybe you want to talk about that. That’s normal, just don’t do it on date night.

1. Be open to romance. Sometimes you have to let yourself be wooed, even if it feels hokey or silly. Accept the compliment graciously. Flirt back.  Dance even when no one else is on the dance floor. Be a fool for love.

Enjoy your date! Go for it!

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